The Loneliness

Written by Algoths Grove

“It’s a weakness from within that prevents the feet from walking or the heart from whispering… “Help me.”

I lost my dearest friend almost a month and a bit ago… I lost her physical form to suicide, and the reasons may be many… lately I have had other friends mention the walk in the snow… with a sadness that has no name in their eyes. I’ve been there. I am there with you every single day… I know the struggle and I know what the emptiness looks like, but I choose only to see the beauty. I have urged them, and I urge you to find the beauty in solace, in the darkness and in the absolute chaotic sound of silence around you.

Suicide is not for the weak, it is not for the chickens and it is not something that should be on anyones to-do list. However, this is the thing… suicide is an absence of hope… it is an absence of being needed and wanted. The problem with this is that when our children are big or our spouses that would provide the warmth leave, we lose sight of why we are here. You are not here for your spouse, you are not here for your children, you are not here for the world, you are here for you! You have work to do, you have a mission, and you chose this contract. It is as simple as that. No one said life is easy, no one said you won’t be alone half the time, no one said every day will be magical, but your contract does say that you can make every day magically beautiful.

Are you strong? The answer is YES! Yes, you are strong, yes you are capable, yes you are magical. For those people who want to take you down, those bosses that try to ruin your day, those ex boyfriends or girlfriends that made you feel worthless, that past that keeps taunting you, those megalomaniacs with the big boobs and the high heels that will go out of their way to try curse you… they all part of the test… each one of them, and guess what… if you stay and you shine your light, you win! You need to be you, so that the world concept and the souls that are born each day may live their contracts. You need to be every single thing that you are so that we can all formulate an awakening of such a magnitude that we can wake up and ascend into something so beautiful that I have no words to describe it. Suicide does not get you there. It is plain and simple. You will return to live again and you will redo the lessons, you will have to run the trials again.

This takes a warrior spirit, it takes motivation and it takes a strong mind to move through the sludge, the unexpected horrors and the midnight waking without a soul. I have walked in the shoes of many people, I have lived a life of such horror but I would not take it back for a second, because all of it was worth it to look into the face of my beautiful sons and my beautiful husband. Maybe your moment is in darkness now… but my fellow soul, I give you my word of honour, that if you look for the beauty, you will find it. If you look for the pain, you will find that too. You need to begin to rewire your days and nights, find your purpose and believe in everything that you are, because, I do. I believe in you, I believe in all of you… each and every one of the people on this planet have a purpose and I believe in each one!

If you cannot do this alone, if you cannot find the light or cannot find the beauty, send us a message, send us an email, or come have a coffee… trust me, we will show you your beauty… we will show you the reason to be…

One Comment

  1. brewandpotionmistress

    Thank you for discussing this poignant topic with so much sensitivity. One of the heart-wretching aspects about suicide for those who are left behind are those gnawing questions: why didn’t they just tell me they were struggling so much? why didn’t I see the signs? why didn’t they just wait a few more hours…life may have not seem so hopeless? Unfortunately, we will never know the answers to these. Although we may acknowledge that we are not responsible for the outcome, feelings of guilt can linger a long time.
    I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. Hugs, dear one….

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s